002 - [VIDEO, public] - job time!

[intofireforever]

[This time, Laura is in the kitchen. It's long after the dinner shift has cleaned up and left for the day. How did she get in there, you ask? Well, she has a key now!]

For those who don't remember me from my introduction last week, I'm Laura Palmer. Mr. Hoffman was kind enough to give me his shift in the kitchen when he switched to inventory management, so from now on, I'll be running breakfast! I worked the dinner shift under Paddy while I was an inmate, and I have extensive food service experience back in my world, so I'm fully prepared for duty.

Right!

[She claps her hands together once, looking pumped.]

Mr. Hoffman was very thorough in his rundown, but I like to double-check these things myself. If anyone has special dietary needs, like religious restrictions, or vegetarianism, or food allergies to be avoided, or anything like that: tell me now! I'll make sure to accommodate everyone who needs it.

[She gives the camera a more knowing look.]

This does not extend to ridiculously fussy eaters who like to be difficult and request bizarre specialties nobody else would eat.

[She smiles again.]

Inmates working the breakfast shift with me, sound off, please! Let's get to know each other and ensure a pleasant working environment.

Comments

[scentbombed]

Thank you, Ms. Palmer. I'm a vegetarian. Quite strictly.

[Private]

...Except every so often when I am, in fact, a wolf.

[intofireforever]

Just 'Laura', if you don't mind. I'll be sure everyone prepares vegetarian items on different surfaces than anything containing meat.

[Private]

[Laura is so accustomed to the idea of vampires and werewolves at this point that she doesn't miss a beat.]

That's fine. Do you need meat dishes provided for you when you're a wolf?

[scentbombed]

Laura. Thanks. I'm Angua.

[Private]

If you wouldn't mind just leaving out a chicken every now and again...

Private

[intofireforever]

Sure thing, Angua. Raw or cooked--and where should I leave it?

Private

[scentbombed]

No, I mean... just the chicken. Anywhere is fine.

[alwayshasaplan]

[Oh holy crap there are getting to be too many spectacular blondes in his life. Cough.]

Uh, yeah, hi, I'm Seth, Hoffman's Inmate. I'm still learning some stuff, but I've been doing a lot of the griddle work the last few months.

[intofireforever]

Hi, Seth--Mr. Hoffman mentioned you. How have you liked the work so far?

[alwayshasaplan]

It's not bad. It's all stuff I can use when I get out. There's not much takeout available in the place I'm going home to.

[intofireforever]

Where are you from?

[She's genuinely interested. She wants to get to know her staff.]

[alwayshasaplan]

Well, we bounced around the Midwest for a while, and when we get out my brother and I will be in El Rey, Mexico. Rough town really but...if you don't mess with people they don't mess with you. And no more goddamn hotel rooms.

[video]

[megamind]

Well, then, mess-woman.... here's my requirements:

I am not human. I am, not by choice but by nature, an ovo-Lacto vegetarian. I can't -- not won't, can't -- do high fat meats at all. Pork and beef are right out. Even lean cuts tend to ...have ill affects.

I can do lean proteins like chicken, though I eat them sparingly.

I won't eat fish. Personal reasons.

There. Fussy, but all within easy to fit dietary restrictions for the most part, and I assure you, medically necessary.

Re: [video]

[intofireforever]

It's Laura, not "mess-woman." I'm more than happy to accommodate dietary restrictions, especially those with medical reasons, but I deserve the same respect I give you.

[video]

[megamind]

Miss Palmer. [ He ties not to be overly familiar with the rabble. That just won't do. ] I'll be able to eat without difficulty, then.

Re: [video]

[intofireforever]

[Miss Palmer is fine by her, if the alternative is mess-woman.]

Of course. There will be plenty of vegetarian options available.

[video]

[megamind]

Good. Then we'll be fine.

[sharpememory]

For the love of god, could you all please where gloves when touching my food? Even those weird clear ones, whatever. Just as long as it happens.

[intofireforever]

Doesn't everyone already wear gloves while serving?

[sharpememory]

Those freaky see through ones don't count.

[intofireforever]

There really aren't any other kind for serving food. What would you want us to wear? Leather? Wool? Those thick yellow rubber ones for washing dishes?

[strangehistorian]

I usually hunt my own, but I'd appreciate it if we continued to have bacon with breakfast!

[intofireforever]

Don't worry, bacon is staying on the menu.

[Because it's fucking DELICIOUS.]

/oops, forgot this guy...

[cannibalmind]

I am Doctor Hannibal Lecter, also on the Breakfast shift. I am a gourmet cook and am available for lessons. I fill in wherever is necessary, and do the serving as needed as well.

Re: /oops, forgot this guy...

[intofireforever]

It's nice to meet you, Hannibal. What kind of gourmet food do you specialize in?

[His name is ringing some faint bells for her; she's heard of the novel, though the movie came after her death.]

[cannibalmind]

Vegetarian and lighter fare, as well as more exotic dishes such as are required by nonhumans here. For example, my last lesson was on crepes. I also bake.

[intofireforever]

Ooh, crepes!

[She likes those!]